Why are Hitmen Funny?: You Kill Me is not good

This review is from Aaron. I respect the passion for which he loathed this movie and this sub genre as a whole. Enjoy.
--Nat

Grosse Point Blank, Analyze This/That, The Matador. Not had enough hitman "dark" comedies? Here's another one for you.

You Kill Me takes place in upstate New York where snow plowing is a very competitive business. One family-run snow plowing biz has a hitman (Frank) on staff to keep competitors off their turf. This particular hitman's work starts to suffer when his drinking problem gets in the way of his hits. I can just hear the pitch meeting to some studio executive: "okay hitmen are funny right? Well let's have a hitman who is an alcoholic and it starts interfering with his work! hahahaha"

Contracted killings and alcoholism are two very funny things. For some reason the boss sends him out to San Francisco to sober up (I guess this is where hitmen go to get sober.) A family associate sets him up with a place to stay and a job at, of all places, a funeral home! Hahahahahaha. See the irony? hahahahahha. AHAHHAHAHAHAHHA. This is where Frank the hitman meets Tea Leoni and goes to AA meetings. He strikes up a relationship with her and reveals that he is an alcoholic. Ok, she can handle that, she has problems of her own. Also he reveals that he is a hitman. Awesome! That's okay too. Really getting the most out of that suspension of disbelief thing. Tea Leoni says "You're an alcoholic and hitman and I'm still with you doesn't that say anything to you?" Yes, your f**king nuts.

After some ups and downs Frank goes back to NY, staying sober but also staying away from Leoni. She follows him out there and helps him kill people and they live happily ever after. This movie totally kills me in the wrong way. The one redeeming aspect was Ben Kingsley's excellent acting chops as Frank the hitman. This goes to show that even good actors have to pay the bills by doing crappy roles. Dont get too pissed, because doing one bad studio movie probably means more cool indie projects they are then able to do.

Look for Cusak, Kingsley and Brosnan try to kill each other in a delightful "dark" comedy called You Kill Grosse Matadors coming out next fall!